Tactically, the pre-match joke is an exercise. Jacob Friis, the Danish manager of Finland, tried one on Friday 2 October at his press conference, ahead of Finland v Albania, Saturday at 3pm in Helsinki. He drew a parallel with the Cristiano Ronaldo drama in the Portugal camp: “Yesterday (Thursday), none of the players left on a private jet, so they are all available. So I’m spoilt for choice.”
Nobody in the room laughed. That one, I run on Tuesday. When we’ve got eleven, that is.
So on Sunday, before the match, I ran it again. Folder open, towel over the shoulder. I said: “Yesterday, nobody left on a private jet, so everyone is available.” Silence in the prefab. The keeper asked what a jet was. The club delegate checked his folder to see if we had one. Two players weren’t there, they were off collecting the kids. Spoilt for choice, at my place, is when I’ve got twelve.
Friis was braver than me: he came back at it at the end of the conference. “You didn’t get the joke at the start.” A journalist answered “We did.” Laughter. He put the silence down to the Finnish character, laughing it off through gritted teeth, and finished with: “You made me look like a fool!”
I tried the comeback at the end of my team talk too. I said: “You didn’t get the joke.” My right back said “We did.” The whole dressing room laughed. It was the first successful team move since September.
A manager who makes his dressing room laugh before a match. In 1980, that would never have happened.
We lost, but it was bucketing down. A flat pitch away, mind you, the joke would have landed first time.
It’s true, we checked: RMC Sport.
